Social media silences my heart.

In this new world driving by social media, where it’s nigh on impossible to sit through your lunch break at work, or an evening at home without checking your phone or tablet for the next status update of someone you love, hate or admire. Or for the narsasitic ego stroking of seeing who liked or commented on your wildly exciting post of what you cooked for dinner or how your child got good grades. It’s heads down and mouth shut, this is the way we communicate nowadays. But how many times have you wanted to say something heart felt and haven’t been actually able to post it because you fear who will see it, how you will be judged or who will see right through you?

Like a lot of people some days I feel so awful inside, all I want to do is be one of those people who complain so I get the sympathy I crave and update the comments box with “I’ll inbox you babe”. But I don’t want to be that needy, attention seeking person or appear weak, so I say nothing, yet this is the ideal platform to reach out to those I know care about me when I need a virtual hug. It’s a bit catch 22 don’t you think?

What about those other days when you feel excited and confident. I have had a major crush on a certain person for a good couple of years now, they have no idea i have liked them from afar for quite so long, in fact I’m not even sure they know I like them in that way at all. But somedays all I want to do is go onto my social media and pop the cork to the shaken champagne bottle of my heart. But I can’t, there are far too many prying eyes other than the one person in question, and all personal curcumstances are certainly not ideal. In fact it would probably be one of those instant regret postings, the ones where you vent and then immediately go back to delete the post in panic hoping no one has seen it, but they inevitably do.

I like anonymity. Because I can say  – I think about you constantly.